Let’s Talk About Sex

And there we have the opening to one of my favorite films of all time, Betty Blue. It begins with a static shot of Betty and Zorg making love for several minutes. The director, Jean-Jacques Beineixis, still confused to this day about whether the actor and actress were actually having sex to this day.

Considering most of the people that visit my blog come from two sites where sex is often discussed and playfully teased about, I think it is appropriate to talk about sex in some of the films that I love and am interested in. For my money, the best bits of sex come about because of intimacy. I defined ‘intimate talks’ on another blog as ‘Baring one’s soul in a direct way without the aid of self-deprecation or asides to distract from what you’re trying to communicate.’ I believe this perfectly fits in with sex. It of course can manifest itself in many different ways for the simple fact that people have, love, and enjoy sex in many different ways.

The film Secretary is one of the few films that Hollywood has gotten right about the BDSM culture. Sadomasochism provides the backdrop for a very unusual employer/employee relationship in this very offbeat romantic drama from filmmaker Steven Shainberg. Lee Holloway (Maggie Gyllenhaal) is a shy young woman, who, after a brief spell in a mental institution, is released in the care of her overprotective mother (Lesley Ann Warren) and hard-drinking father (Stephen McHattie). The film works, as with the essence of BDSM, because it has two candidates capable of being honest about what they enjoy and trusting one another enough not to cross the line.

A Good Day to be Black & Sexy is one of my favorite films in recent years. It features a series of vignettes that explore the nuances and frustrations with black sexuality. I’d rather not spoil it because I would like to go into it in more detail in it’s own blog post, but some of the topics that it explores are infidelity, masturbation, interracial dating and several more. My favorite bits of the film have to do with the anxiety and awkwardness of the build up and aftermath of sex that often occurs.

The last two picks will be different series of documentaries. The first is Sex: How To Do Everything, which is just like the title says about how to everything in sex. SEX: How To Do Everything is a groundbreaking ten-part series featuring renowned sexperts Em & Lo setting out to whip your sex life into seriously seductive shape. Each episode is full of information, interviews and how-to demonstrations from various models illustrating a variety of different techniques, from the ordinary to the super-scandalous.

Aimed equally at guys and gals, singles and couples – Em & Lo will stop at nothing to dish out all there is to know about everything from orgasms and seduction to roleplay and toys. So don’t be afraid of some explicit explorations of sex in every flavor – SEX: How To Do Everything is a fun-loving series designed to get you having better sex and more of it. You can watch the trailer here –>http://kino.com/video/item.php?film_id=1021

The final film recommendations are a series by Comstock Films which features interviews with 6 different couples that explore a wide range of human sexuality which includes, male/male, female/female, and an older couple for example. In addition to the conversations we get about the history of the couple and how they have/enjoy sex. We actually get to see the see the couples have sex. So the audience has already has an idea behind the built in emotion and what is going on in each partner’s thoughts while they have sex. It is an absolutely beautiful thing to see and if sex is supposed to be included in cinema, this is an excellent blueprint to start. Below is a trailer from one the films Ashley and Kisha: Finding the Right Fit. I implore you purchase all the films in set, it is a wonderful source into what the term ‘making love’ really means outside of teenage dreams and love songs. http://www.comstockfilms.com/index.html


About panamaenrique

Afro-Latino film lover in NYC. I love blues, jazz, soul, funk, and everything else under the sun. Any questions, comments, or concerns about anything I say, feel free to hit me up. My contact info is there and I'll be sure to give you a lengthy response about what I said and why I said it.
This entry was posted in Film musings, Life meets the movies. Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Let’s Talk About Sex

  1. *OnlyYolie* says:

    i agree with your definition of intimate talks and intimacy being the baring of one’s inner self while feeling that this state of vulnerability will not make you “vulnerable”…

    secretary is one of my favorite films!! i was totally enraptured by the evolution of their relationship, the trust and the love. on the other site when we were speaking about movie scenes we would like to happen in real life, i mentioned that i wanted a man to bathe me and wash my hair with the tenderness and concern that was shown in that scene.

    i saw a good day to be black and sexy and found it funny… the part with the baby wipes and gargling was something i personally couldn’t relate to but hey there must be those kind of people out there somewhere…

    i haven’t seen any of the other films you mentioned but i will put them on my list…

  2. Shanelle says:

    I found yoru blog through today’s VSB post comments. I immediately had to click and follow as soon as you threw out two really great black films “Pariah” (which I praise ENDLESSLY) and “A Good Day to be Black and Sexy”. Most of the time when people say that there are good black films they cite 90’s era black enlightenment film. I am so happy to have found someone whose knowledge spans beyond that!

    Great blog. You are very knowledgeable. I will def follow because you are teaching me somethings!

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